As I mentioned in my post The Things They Don’t Tell You About Having Babies – Part 1 there is so much that goes unsaid about child rearing.
In part, I think it might have to do with the fact that no one wants to be “those parents”.
You know the ones I mean.
The ones who refuse to admit that they co – sleep, or let their children play with (or eat) anything other than organic, locally made teething toys.
But guess what?! We all know that eventually you cave. That all those well-meaning ideas about only cloth diapering and making your own organic baby food fall by the way side. Because real life is going to set in and you are going to realize that all those big dreams and aspirations aren’t nearly as important as having a happy baby.
And a happy baby is a well rested baby (so I hear).
So how does one ensure they have a well rested baby?
They do it by Co-Sleeping.
Yup! It’s true! I know that no one wants to admit that this is something they do. Doctors tell you not to do it, your “mom friends” tell you not to do it – hell the INTERNET tells you not to do it (and if it’s on the internet it has to be true right?). But you know what, if you are smart about it and take some necessary precautions, co-sleeping might be the ONLY thing that allows both you and the brand new baby – or infant, or toddler – in your life to actually get some sleep.
And you are going to need it.
Because eventually the whole “Purple Crying” thing happens.
Not sure what purple crying is? Well, according to the period of purple crying website it is defined as “the time in a baby’s life when they cry more than any other time”.
And guess what, they aren’t kidding.
Yes, babies cry.
In fact, they cry A LOT.
But nothing compares to this purple crying thing – unless of course you have a colicky babe – but that is a different thing entirely. So what does purple crying really mean? Well, your kid is going to cry for hours. At the top of their lungs. FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON. And there isn’t a single thing that you can do about it. You will change them, feed them, burp them, fart them – yes, pushing out farts is a thing – and they will still cry. You might eventually get them to sleep by rocking them back and forth next to a stream of running water (ie, the tap) but as soon as you try to put them down – the crying starts all over again.
And in case I haven’t made it clear. It is awful. Heartbreakingly awful. No one tells you that for weeks (and maybe even months) you are going to listen to your child sound like they are in tremendous pain and you won’t be able to do a thing to make it better. You will hold them, and rock them, and sing to them, and make secret deals with the devil to make the crying stop.
*Please note: you may also make secret deals with the devil when it comes to sleeping too
And then come the teeth.
And a baby who won’t sleep, won’t eat, and is generally angry as a cat in water. You will try every teething toy imaginable – ones that vibrate, ones made of wood, ones make of organic silicone (locally made of course), ones that you can put in the fridge – but trust me, nothing will be as satisfying to your child as biting your flesh.
Did I mention that their teeth are RAZOR sharp. And that isn’t even an understatement. If I could think of something sharper than a razor that is what I would be comparing them to. If you ask me, that’s why so many women quit breastfeeding at 6 months.
BECAUSE GETTING YOUR NIPPLES BIT WITH RAZORS IS NOT A GOOD TIME!
Of course I know that there are a few parents out there that have made the whole clothing diapering, organic everything, never letting my baby sleep in my bed thing, work out for them – and trust me – there is a part of me that is hugely jealous of those moms (thanks Instagram – ie, #igmotherhood).
But instead of trying to appear like I have everything under control and that I follow all the “rules” of proper parenting, I embrace the fact that I am not perfect. And I have a happy kid, so I certainly can’t complain.